Jun 032006
I cleaned out my cupboard tonight, and amongst my old bank statements I had filed away I found an acrostic poem that Lauren wrote for me…
C is for Cassie, that is your name
A is for angry man, your eternal flame (not)*
S is for social club, the discounts you get
S is for Sally, whom we’ll never forget
I is for Inuit Throat Song, that beautiful sound
E is for every animal you’ve brought home from the pound.
*That won’t make sense unless you know who angry man is. And I’m not saying. It might have been relevant last year but no longer means anything.
I found what I have been looking for for ages. It’s not the same as I remember it. Leslie Nielsen is so matter-of-fact in the delivery of his lines that it seemed funnier. Now it just looks incendiary.President Harris: [to the U.N] So, an Indian, a Frenchman, and the Pope are all on a plane. The pilot says “Hey, are any of you not circumcised?” So the Pope lifts up his robe and says “Shut up, stupid! You don’t even speak english!” The Israeli asks the Japanese guy to open his eyes, but the Japanese man says “I’m not squinting you crazy Jew, you’re the one who sold me these cheap glasses!” What’s the difference between a Belgian and a lump of dog shit? The Belgian drinks wine, but the dog shit smells good.