She moves in mysterious ways (yeah right!)

 Family, Friends, Summer  No Responses »
Oct 312001
 

Agh. I am so thirsty. As soon as I finish this entry, I’m going upstairs to get a nice cool glass of water with a billion ice cubes in it.. mmm…

I’m a bit tired today. Last night I went trick-or-treating with the little girls from across the road, Luka and Ceda. I volunteered to walk around the streets with them because they weren’t allowed to do it without adult supervision. Hmph. Adult now, am I? Doesn’t seem like it sometimes. Anyway, who wants to be an adult? How boring! I’m going to be young for as long as possible. You can do anything when you’re young. Of course, you still have to deal with the consequences, but they aren’t as harsh as when you get older. Young people are expected to do wild, spontaneous things. Like tomorrow, I get paid, and I could just go buy a train ticket to Townsville to visit my cousin. But then again, that would mean I have no money for the next two weeks. Wish I didn’t think so logically. People who do those sorts of spur-of-the-moment things just seem to have it work out. It ends up being a huge adventure and they live happily ever after. I suppose I’m just bored. Yeah, that’s it… bored.

I dressed up as neko neko last night… which is basically just a cat girl. I had shiny silver ears and a little black nose and black sparkley lips. I felt so tall.. I felt like gulliver must have felt in lilliput. It wasn’t just the kids I was taller than – most of the adults seemed small too. It could have been cause I had on chunky shoes… hm. maybe i’m taller than just 5′10″. How cool would that be? ^_^ Also, yesterday I went and saw the future olympic diving squad having fun diving from cliffs into the green & blue pools. The blue pool used to be a quarry, and one afternoon the workers hit a spring and when they came back the next morning, the quarry wasn’t there anymore – just a big pool. The blue pool is so deep… But the cliffs are higher at the green pool. I’m not too sure of the story of the green pool, because it’s not as deep as the blue pool… it’s only about 3 1/2 metres deep. The divers found that out when they jumped off the cliff above the green pool… no one got hurt, but we didn’t believe that they had touched the bottom until one of the guys ducked underwater, and when he came back up again he had a chunk of rock in his hand. I couldn’t stop laughing. They were all really beautiful people, but a bit self-absorbed. I guess you have the right to be self-absorbed when you’ve already won a medal at the olympics… ho hum. They are really good at making you feel insignificant and unimportant, but I didn’t mind because they were pretty impressive. I wasn’t worried about feeling less important than them, because it’s not as if I’m competing with them or anything. It was pretty fun all round ^_^

Anyways, on a totally different note, the achtung babies are due to arrive this afternoon. They are staying in the guest room at Lou and Mike’s for a couple of weeks, then staying here in our spare room for a few more weeks while Lou’s parents are over from England. Should be interesting… their names are Horst and Gitar (sp) and I’m brushing up on my german to speak to them… My cousin-in-law, Ollie, is german, and last time i saw him was at my other cousin’s wedding. He taught me how to say g’day, good morning, good afternoon, it’s cold, and asshole. He taught me the last one because, as he said, “the swears are the first ones you learn”. he was a funny guy.

I’ve kept having the same thought over the past few days, that I wish I had a boyfriend. Which is a stupid thing to wish, because it’s not as if boyfriends are just objects that you pick up at the supermarket or whatever… guys are people too. I can’t just go out with someone for the sake of having someone to go out with. But I think the reason I want a boyfriend is because I’m bored, and also it’d be nice to have someone new to talk to… I need some variety damnit! I’m such a drama queen. Ignore me.

I kept my hair down this morning after I brushed it, instead of putting it back into a bun/ponytail like i usually do, and mum said “Cassie! You look like a different person!” Yes, mum, my hair has grown long. This is the longest it’s been for quite a while, and I’m not sure if I want to get it cut. It’s really soft and shiny at the moment, so I don’t think I’ll do anything yet. There are heaps of things to do with long hair, but in summer it’s too hot to just leave it down. hehehe… never thought I’d have so much to say about hair… but it’s a really nice colour too… sort of two-toned… the bottom half of my hair is black, and the top half is dark brown/auburn, and they graduate into one another in the middle. I wonder what I’d look like with my natural colour hair… I haven’t had my natural colour since I was 14. People always say blondes have more fun, but I think it’s up to you how much fun you have. Maybe blondes have more fun because they expect to. Hmmm… it’s all in your mind ;)

Anyways, I’m going to go get a drink now… I wasn’t going to write this much…

 Posted by casbot at 7:39 pm

uhu… pilottttttt…. yoohoo…. pilllllooooottttttt

 Dreams, Family, Friends, Summer, Wooloweyah, Work  No Responses »
Oct 302001
 

sorry bout that… just remembering those weirdo uhu/pilot ads that used to be on tv, with all different clips from tv shows or movies or whatever, with the characters saying ‘uhu’ or ‘pilot’ in different ways. The reason that ad popped into my head is because I bought a new pen yesterday (well, i didn’t really buy it, dad did. I put it on his account at the newsagents), and it’s a pilot pen. It had a barcode sticker on it, and it was one of those stickers that, when you pull it off the pen, you can stretch it out so that the numbers become really long and stuff… I don’t know what I’m talking about. Stretchable stickers… yeah.

Anyways, am feeling a bit muddled because of a dream I had last night. Can’t remember it very well… Basically it involved a helicopter, a weird place with lots of clothes, a big table with christmas food laid out on it (ham, chicken, salads, trifle…) and also shadows. Shadows of me and my sister’s roommate, Penny. weird… I seem to have quite a knack for interpreting other peoples dreams, but can never correctly figure out my own.

agh. It’s really hot today. Not as hot as yesterday, but it’s only 9:47am. Yesterday was soooo hot, because there was a Westerly breeze that brought with it all the flies from inland… I hate flies. My little sister, Rosie, and I went swimming in the pool across the road from our house. It’s owned by our friends Sue & Alan. The water was so nice, but rosie kept pushing me under the water, and saying “be my surfboard!” yeah right! she then said “Look at me cassie – I can be ocean girl!” and then proceeded to tell me I was her dolphin. She can be so annoyingly immature at times. All I wanted to do was have a refreshing swim. I wasn’t in the mood to play along with her little games. Dooop dooop dooopedy ay.

Anyways, might go for a swim today too. I’m glad I remembered to hang my swimmers out, cause I just can’t stand putting wet swimsuits on… ew. when I was younger I practically lived in my swimmers, I was such a little waterbaby. I guess I still am a waterbaby, but my main modes of transport (mum and dad) aren’t too interested in the fact that I still love to swim. Oh well, have to go get my L’s soon. Again. This time I’ll actually follow through and get my P’s as well ^_^

Oh and another thing. Went shopping yesterday, and asked at Crazy Clarks for an application form. Crazy clarks is a stupid store, but it’s the only place with nice people. The manager guy told me to bring in my resume next time I came in. I’ll see if dad is going in today. I’ll have to redo my resume though, because last time I wrote it up I was concentrating mainly on my clerical and journalistic (is that even a word?) experience… I didn’t include that I worked for dad at the door of the concerts he promoted, handling ticket sales etc… I think that would be more relevant than “twelve months work as junior correspondent/journalist for The Review”. yeah. ok. I’m off now ^_^

 Posted by casbot at 5:54 pm

Survey

 Animals, Anime, Beach, Books, Christmas, Family, Food, Love, Music, Summer, Wooloweyah  No Responses »
Oct 292001
 

Well, to begin with I didn’t really think I’d do this survey thing. But, now I feel a bit less inhibited (mostly due to the fact that summer storm did it) so here goes…

1. Full name:

Cassandra (I think I might have already put this up in the second entry of my diary…)

2. Nicknames:

cassava, melon, cassju, anna-may (as in ‘anime’)

3. Age:

18

4. Birth date:

23 April 1983

5. Zodiac sign:

Taurus. I am so stubborn, apparently… I guess that’s true ^_^

6. Location:

Yamba, a small fishing town on north coast nsw, Australia, between Byron Bay and Coffs Harbour.

7. Place of birth:

Manly, Sydney, Australia

8. Hair color:

dark brown/auburn… but I dyed it. Natural colour is blonde.

9. Eye color:

light blue. I was told that all babies are born with blue eyes, and that they change into whatever colour later on. But what about asian or black babies? Also, did you know that the gene for blue eyes is recessive? I wonder why so many people have blue eyes…

10. Height:

5′10″

11. Piercings, tattoos:

I have pierced ears. Got them done when I was four, and never let them close up.

- Favorites -

12. Music type:

My music taste is quite eclectic. I like a lot of different music. Although, just because I like a song from one genre doesn’t mean I’ll like all of them.

13. Bands/Groups:

Um… The bands/artists I have favourite songs from are Coldplay, Kelis, Ben Harper, Alex Lloyd, Sunk Loto, TLC, All Saints, Craig David, Nelly Furtado, Mandy Moore (^_^), silverchair, sugar ray, natalie imbruglia, Jennifer Lopez, Mya, Fuel, Pink, Cafe Del Mar (that topped off the list of some very poppy groups!), Ben Lee, powderfinger, Nine Inch Nails

14. Songs:

I’m like a bird – Nelly Furtado
No Scrubs – TLC
Steal my kisses – Ben Harper
Emotion Sickness – Silverchair

15. Books:

My favourite book of all time is Habibi, by Naomi Shihab Nye. Others are Memoirs of a Geisha by um… can’t remember now ;) , The Hundred Secret Senses by Amy Tan, the Tomorrow series by John Marsden, The Postman by David Brin (the book is much, much better than the movie), and I’m starting to read the Harry Potter series, which seems interesting.

16. Comics:

Um… I just read the comics in the newspaper when I get the chance… and the ones in the tv guide on sundays. I like the charicatures drawn of politicians and famous people, and I also like the comics in mad magazine.

17. Comic characters:

ah… um… from the manga ‘ah my goddess’ i like urd and skuld…. and from ranma 1/2 I like ranma and that guy that turns into a pig.

18. Quality in the same sex:

sense of humour, insanity, happy, fun… friendly ^_^, tolerant.

19. Quality in the opposite sex:

probably the same as for the same sex… Only thing I can really say I have is shallowness. You kinda get sick of superficiality real quick.

20. Hobbies:

Reading, drawing, writing poetry, swimming, going to the beach, making things… smiling… kayaking… ^_^

21. Cereal:

if I have to eat cereal (I’m rarely in the mood for it) I eat weet-bix. Nine out of ten nutritionists recommend kids eat weet-bix. Do you think their advertising campaign is working? ;)

22. Day of the week:

I like Friday, cause that’s when I get paid. And it’s also when everybody is in a good mood because it’s the end of the week. People are more relaxed on friday afternoons.

23. Month:

December ^_^

24. Season:

Summer. I kind of have a backwards way of thinking. You’d think that when it’s hot, you’d wish for the cold months, and when it’s cold, you’d wish for the hot months. Well, in summer, summer is my favourite season. In winter, winter is my favourite season. I guess you could say I’m just happy with whatever season it is ^_^

25. Holiday:

Christmas! I love Christmas! It’s my favourite time of the whole year. Even though the past few christmases have been horrible (last christmas I had a breakdown, christmas before that I was practically a skeleton from not eating, and christmas before that mum and dad had a huge fight), I still look forward to it with the excitement and anticipation I had when I was little. I love going to Grafton to go Christmas Shopping. I love the tradition of getting one new christmas decoration each, every year. I love going to the beach on Christmas day. I love seeing family and friends together in one huge group. I love the feeling in the air and the smells and the emotions etc… ^_^

26. Cartoon:

Simpsons. No contest. There might have been a contest if anime was mentioned… but the simpsons is the best cartoon ever. I love homer, he’s my favourite. I love the episode where he squeezes a penny and it goes up into his arm and marge goes “oh homer, not again. Don’t take ’squeeze every penny’ so literally” lol. so stupid. but if anime had been included, I would say neon genesis evangelion first of all, or cardcaptors, or magic knight rayearth…

27. Pizza toppings:

BBQ meatlovers pizza, but only from pizza hut. I don’t like bbq meatlovers from other stores. If I have to get a pizza from other stores, gimme one with everything, except those little fish. anchovies… yeah that’s them. I don’t want any o’ dem.

28. Animal(s):

I love monkeys. They are the best. I love cats too, especially big cats like tigers and panthers and… cheetahs and stuff.

29. School subject:

Although I’ve been out of school a while, my favourite subjects were english and French. I also liked art, though I never got very good grades in art because I was constantly being compared to my older sister, and she’s like… the next picasso or something, but without all that crazy stuff he did.

- Do you…? -

30. Have pets:

yes. I have one cat called Dinna, one goldfish called redkelp, two shubunkins called Jen and Shu Lien. And there are two cats that live here that are sort of mine… Mother and Baby. Baby is the daughter of Mother. Mother had five babies behind the couch in my room, and baby was the only one that survived.

31. Have a “boyfriend/girlfriend:”

nope, not right at the moment. I don’t really need one either… well I might, but not for the sake of being able to say “yes I have a boyfriend”. If I meet a guy I like, that likes me back, then I’m not against a relationship ^_^

32. Smoke:

nope.

33. Drink:

sometimes, but I find I become insecure and melancholy when I drink, whereas if i don’t drink I’m hyper and happy and all that good stuff.

34. Do drugs:

nopes.

35. Have siblings:

yes. I have an older sister, Lauren who is 19, and a younger sister, Rosie, who is 13.

36. Sleep with stuffed animals:

no. I used to, but it seemed pointless as I always kicked them off the bed while I was asleep anyway. I had a hello kitty and this really old koala that nanny bought me before she died (at the expo 1988)

37. Prefer being hot or cold:

really, you’d have to refer back to the season question. I like being hot when it’s hot, and cold when it’s cold. I adapt very well.

- Would you rather…? -

38. One pillow or more:

one pillow. My pillow is about 30 years old… my nan made it ^_^ it’s the best pillow ever.

39. Being here or there:

here. I’m quite happy where I am. Sometimes I think I’d rather be there, but I know I can always go there if I want to.

40. Pencil or pen:

pen is best for drawing and writing. a lot of people like pencils for sketching, but pens are better for me ^_^

41. Be deaf or blind:

deaf. I couldn’t live without sight. Besides, you can always learn to lipread, and you can watch other people talking and figure out what they’re saying ;) lol. Plus, if you’re at a party or a club, and you’re dancing, the music is pumping anyway so I figure you’d be able to pick up the vibrations through the floor.

42. Snow or rain:

snow! I love snow. Ever since I went to Perisher-Smiggens when I was in yr 6… I was a natural at skiing, and snow was just soo… cool!

42. Chocolate milk or plain:

chocolate ^_^ oh, except for on cereal. I have to have plain. Imagine chocolate milk on weet-bix!

- Random Things -

43. What was/will be the best day of your life?

best day so far was… when I found out I didn’t have to have a spinal fusion operation… yay!

44. Confide a fairly deep secret that you can share:

um… something I haven’t told anyone… Well, I used to be an army cadet… lol. that’s not really a secret is it?

45. Are you ticklish?

yes, on every inch of my entire body. even my hands, and ears, and face.. lol.

46. Who do you consider to be “cool?”

ah come on… cool? how passé. Like I said before – I think snow is cool, but snow isn’t human. I think my cat is cool – yeah, he’s really aloof. way cool man.

47. What would you believe is the most important factor in life?

Love. All you need is love. ^_^ Tolerance comes along with love, as does everything else. Love is the most important factor. Is it even a factor? I don’t know.

 Posted by casbot at 8:03 pm

Awww it’s a cute little snakey-wakey

 Love  No Responses »
Oct 282001
 

ok, ok, i admit it. i am weird, crazy, confusing… but i’m also vibrant, beautiful and funny ^_^ does that make up for it? I thought I’d put this quote in this entry, because most people get pissed off when you give yourself compliments. They say “hmph. she LOVES herself.” like that’s a bad thing! I love myself, yes i do. I’m sure you love yourself too, but you’d never tell anyone. I love my skin. it’s always so clear and soft and smooth… and it tans easily. Thank you skin! Majority of the people reading this now would be officially freaked out. Give me a break kids! i’m in a weird mood. I also like my eyes. They’re huge, and they sparkle and they’re such a nice colour… hehehe… maybe i should just stop the self-affirmations for a little while ^_^.

Anyways, here’s the quote I mentioned earlier in this entry ^_^ it’s from nelson mandela.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are born to make manifest the Glory of God that is within us. It’s not in some of us, it’s in everyone, and as we let our own light shine, we consciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Nelson Mandela, June 1997

So, there you have it. If you’re atheist/agnostic, it’s still relevant, because the parts about God aren’t really all that important.

Anyways, enuffa dat from me for now. I’m gonna go have a nice warm shower… nighty nights ^_^

 Posted by casbot at 3:44 am

I don’t want to be your baby girl

 Angst, Cynicism, Family, Food, Friends, Going out, Shopping  No Responses »
Oct 232001
 

Kinda bored right now. I was supposed to go into town to do some shopping, but mum was being completely nasty because her boyfriend was a bitch to her. Sorry mum, but it’s not my problem. Now I have no food until tomorrow afternoon at the earliest… ho hum life goes on… or does it? Yes, indeed it does.

I think I’m just going to relate various incidents that occurred last week as I remember them. I can’t be bothered keeping them all in order, cause sometimes I feel more like writing about the later ones than the ones that happened earlier. A main feature of my week (almost two weeks) in brisvegas was the obligatory sleazy man. Three sleazy men crossed my path over the past two weeks, all of them unbelievably disgusting… eugh. makes me sick just thinking about it. First one was last thursday night when I went out with Lauren, Renee, Chris and Jodie. I was very tired and upset (due to an argument i had with chris earlier that afternoon) and so I decided to go home. Lauren and I went to the bus station under the myer centre. While we were standing outside a subway stall, some guy came up behind me and put his arm around my waist. I jumped about 10 feet into the air, and quickly pulled away from him. He was plastered, and started to say something about not attempting to do what he did to me, to ‘my friend’ (lauren) because she was blonde. He said blondes have more class than brunettes. What a fucking wanker.

The second encounter with a weirdo was when me and Greta were out in the valley, pretending to be french tourists. We went up to a whole group of cute guys and asked them (in french) where we could find the monastery night club. all of a sudden, this old guy (he was about 40) came up and grabbed me from behind, and I ran and hid behind one of the guys. I was so frightened. The old guy kept trying to follow me and I was nearly in tears. I shouted at him “Tu as la merde pour la tete!” which basically means “shithead”. He said “what??” really angrily, and me and greta ran away.

Then, the last one was the same night, after me and Greta had almost been killed by a car that slammed into a barrier between the road and the footpath. We both had fragments of glass in the backs of our legs from when we had run away, and when we got to the taxi rank outside a club, this guy came up to us and goes “what’s going on girls?” he tried to touch me and greta and I started crying all over again. He said “come to the (something) club with me”. then when we ignored him and went to stand near the guy that was controlling everyone getting into the taxis, the stupid sleazy old guy (he, too, was about 40) got into OUR taxi. The fucking bastard. Grrr I am so mad now. I wish I had just… slapped those guys when I had the chance. Agh… I wonder if it’s possible for anyone to restore my faith in guys. Probably not.

 Posted by casbot at 3:44 am

Purple hills, eh?

 Family, Friends, Going out, Music  No Responses »
Oct 212001
 

Ah home at last. I have sooooo much stuff to write here that it’s not funny. First of all, one major incident that completely negated my last entry… Destiny’s Child cancelled their concert because of the current international political situation. So, after much indecision and frustrated sighs, we decided that I would go with Chris to Brisvegas instead, to go clubbing and all that crap. We set off for Brisvegas on Thursday lunchtime. It was decided that I would be staying at Chris’s place, and not at my sister’s, because… well, I think because I was supposed to be spending the weekend with chris anyways.

Me, Chris and Lauren went out clubbing on Thursday night, and I had to keep giving them both more money, because they didn’t have enough. The clubs were pretty expensive because I didn’t have my student card, and that also meant that I couldn’t go to the downunder bar. To go there on Thursday nights, you need to be a student or a backpacker. It’s pretty fun, apparently. So I missed out on that one. But we went to Fridays, Rowers and Mary Street and the Matrix. The best club that night was Mary Street, cause it had a cool atmosphere and a lot of people, whereas most of the othe clubs were half empty (or half full for all the optimists ;)

That was that until Saturday, when Chris and I went out in the valley. We first went to Monastery, which had really good music. Chris, Simone (chris’s flatmate who we had met up with) and I went to dance in a circular alcove off to the side a bit. There was a girl dancing behind me, who I didn’t take any notice of, but she kept moving closer to me and I kept having to move away… She was trying to dance with me! From then on, everyone took great joy in joking about me having ‘lesbian vibes’. It wasn’t that insulting, because it doesn’t hold as much stigma as the infamous ‘gay vibes’ for boys.

Anyways, that’s the summary of the first weekend at Chris’s. Only other thing I can think to include would be heaps of fast food and alcohol ;) leaving me feeling not so good on Monday morning….

 Posted by casbot at 6:46 pm

Stupid card – return to your power confined!

 Angst, Family, Friends, Shopping, Wooloweyah  No Responses »
Oct 082001
 

Just a little bit of Cardcaptors humour there… Had one of the most stupid weekends in the history of … well… weekends i guess.

Cousins from dad’s side came down to visit. Basically they are snobby. I think i wrote about them in another entry… westie snobs. They have the ability to make you feel so inadequate. Except for Ian, the husband, and Ben, the son. So really it’s just the women of the family. Annette (the mother, wife of Ian) is so… ignorant and bitchy. Her daughter, Melanie, is like an Annette in training. I was telling her about how I was going to sydney, and how i was taking the train, and she said “I’m catching the plane back from sydney to brisbane. It was only $87. I can’t believe anyone would be stupid enough to pass up that offer to go on a train instead”. Then I said that the train was $95 return. She made some comment about it being economy, and that really pissed me off. What the hell is the difference between economy and first class when you’re just going to sydney? We’ll be on the train from 6:30am until 7pm I think… I’m not sure. But it’s not as if First class would be all that different. Do they even have a first class? they probably do. I wouldn’t know, cause i’m such a derro that I always have to travel in economy. Melanie made it sound like one of those dusty old trains in india or something, where economy is where people sit with their chickens and rice and… whatever else. I don’t know what i’m talking about. But i won’t let melanie’s stupid snootiness get me down.

All day today I’ve been organising the trip. I called my aunty sue and we can stay at her house. When we get off the train at Central, we go down to circular quay and catch the manly ferry across to manly wharf. After that, it’s a trip down memory lane ^_^ I called lauren today and she said that I can borrow her discman, because i asked chris and he said that she can borrow his cd player while we’re away, so that’s all good. Also, Lauren is lending me her dress to go clubbing in. Jade, silver and black sparkly snakeskin halterneck… only thing i need now is shoes. Finding black, strappy clubbing shoes is quite difficult when you have a size 10 1/2-11 foot. But I won’t stress over it. I’ve got all day friday to go looking for shoes.

I have to dye my hair again too… this time blueberry. Just a temporary dye, because I’m not sure why, but I’m growing the black out. But black with blonde roots looks really strange, so I have to keep putting temporary dyes in until it gets long enough to cut the black off. I like my hair black, it’s all shiny and stuff, like rachael leigh cook’s hair in ’she’s all that’. Oh i am so conceited. ho hum, not much i can do about that ^_^.

Another good thing that’s happening is that lauren is giving me $40 to go towards the shoes. I guess now that she’s working and i’m the povo one, she can afford to give me money… at the start of this year, when she didn’t have a job, she used to call me and ask me if I could put some money into her account. I was doing some work in a solicitors office at the time, so when I got my paycheck one week, I surprised lauren by depositing the whole thing into her account. Granted it was only $50, but that was the only money i had to spend. I figured that if i kept it, i’d only spend it on something stupid that i didn’t need. So i gave it to lauren. I love her so much, she’s so beautiful.

Anyways, I am really pissed off that I keep getting these emails that say “see buffy riding cock” or something along those lines. I mean, why do i get links to porn sites? It’s so stupid. Porn is one of the most ludicrous things ever, like instead of watching, why don’t you just *do* it? That brings me to another point… I’m at a loss as to why guys will check me out but not approach me. I asked the last guy who asked me out, and he said i acted older than I actually was (he thought I was in my early 20’s)and that I was intimidating. Me? intimidating? honestly… Maybe it’s because I’m usually happy? or because I don’t walk with my shoulders slumped, looking at my feet? or maybe it’s all the bright colours i wear… I love red, orange, pink and yellow. they make me feel effervescent… ^_^ I’m not a slut or promiscuous, but maybe i’m too picky, and have to lower my standards? Agh actually, i don’t have standards. I just like guys to be clean (a big ask?), nice, and able to make me laugh. The last part isn’t too hard ^_^.

I’m kind of in a weird mood after a dream i had the other night. Won’t retell the dream here, but you can guess what it was about. I think. But about me acting older than i am… I don’t know. I’m not entirely sure what to do about that. I’m not just going to act all juvenile and immature just because my age indicates that I should… i love being me ^_^. It is kinda strange tho, cause when i went out with my friends for the last time before i turned 18 (meaning the last time i went out illegally) I was the only one not to get asked for id. And my friends were 18 and 21. I was 17 at the time, and did not once get asked for id. We went to both the club and the pub (the only two places open after 9pm in town). It was kinda fun, but the novelty wore off after a while, and because it’s hard for me to get drunk, i found it difficult to relate to my friends once they were really drunk. It was funny though. Funny being the only sober one, and people tell you things that they wouldn’t normally tell you.

 Posted by casbot at 8:31 am

mmm condensed milk…

 Angst, Family, Friends, Movies, Shopping, Summer, Wooloweyah  No Responses »
Oct 062001
 

i know i’ve been lazy with my journal entries lately. I just haven’t been feeling very inspired! at the moment, mum and her boyfriend, and rosie too, are watching this movie called ‘the big blue’ or something. it was pretty interesting for a while, but i couldn’t concentrate on it for that long. the guy in it, jaque, is soooo cute. he’s so beautiful..

So anyway, a couple of things have me worried… firstly, my cousins might be coming down today, along with my aunty and uncle. they make me feel uncomfortable, they are complete westies, and at the same time, they are complete snobs. They are also racist, and if there’s one thing i CANNOT STAND it is racism. last time i saw them they went on and on about how the asians were taking over their suburb and how the signs at the grocery store were written both in english and chinese or japanese. Personally, I think that if you own the store, you can write the name of it in whatever language you like. bloody idiots.

The other thing that is bothering me is that on thursday, chris went out clubbing in lismore. It’s not that I am upset that he didn’t tell me, because he did. I’m upset because he had asked me if I wanted to go clubbing on thursday night, and i said yes, and we arranged that he was going to pick me up so i could get a lift with him… but the thing is, he never did, and I’m wondering why. He’s acting kind of strange, and I don’t know what’s wrong with him. The last time i talked to him he seemed sort of distant… i have a bad feeling about this. Chris and i never fight. We’ve only fought twice in our friendship, and we’ve been friends for 14 years. what’s up with him? grr.

Next thing i have to do : get a swimming costume. I plan on going swimming this summer in the mornings… practise for something i’m not sure of yet. ^_^

ciao ciao ^_^

 Posted by casbot at 2:38 am

Don’t make me over

 Family, Wooloweyah  No Responses »
Oct 022001
 

Wow.. has it really been a week since i’ve written in here? Time flies when you’re procrastinating, which is kind of ironic i think. Please – no comments about the definition of irony and how wrong the above statement may be – I really don’t care ^_^

Yesterday, due to some serious goose-steppping by me, we got the tickets for Destiny’s Child. Really great seats too. And paid for them with dad’s credit card ^_^. so chris and i are going to sydney on about the 10th October, and spending a couple of days clubbing and looking around, and then on saturday 13th, we go to the concert. Really, for me, the concert is not the most important or fun part. Just spending time with my bestest bud will be great. yay! it’s actually happening! (as chris said last night on the phone..)

Anyways, yesterday Rosie and I went and borrowed Tim (guy from up the road)’s kayak. We carried it along the lake, and then I went out on the lake. I watched mum & marty in their orange motorboat getting towed along by our neighbour’s boat because theirs had stopped, and i thought about how lazy they were not to just use the paddles. Or just get out and pull the boat along behind. The water would only be up to their thighs. So I paddled into the little pocket of sheltered estuary about 500 metres from our place. It was so beautiful. But then the wind picked up and I had so much trouble trying to get back in to shore. I was being thrown around by the waves, even though they were small they were really strong. When I got back to shore I was so exhausted, as i carried the kayak up the hill to our place my arms were shaking so much.. i need more practise lol..

apart from that, nothing else has happened… ^_^ boring life hey?

 Posted by casbot at 9:27 pm
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